Friday, May 03, 2013

Star Trek: Into Crapness

The reviews are coming in for JJ Drek 2: Into Crapness. Mr. Beaks at Ain't It Cool News, and Silas Lesnick at Coming Soon.Net reveal the ugly truth about how the Jar Jar Abrams brain trust of Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci (a mentally disturbed conspiracy theorist and "truther") and Damon Lindelof, the guy who screwed up the ending to Lost and inflicted Prometheus upon us, all gathered together in their dark lair, and set out to rape Gene Roddenberry's legacy. For full spoilers on this atrocity of a "movie" made for suckers willing to be mulct and mouth breathers who like explosions and illogic all on display in glittering 3D read a detailed synopsis here. The fact that this film may make any money at all only speaks to the decay of society, and the failure of the culture to uphold any standards of aesthetics. Don't waste your hard earned money on this crap, don't surrender your money to pick pockets and thieves who are parasites on the Roddenberry legacy. Little JJ has made the moral equivalent of a snuff film.  Theatre goers should shun and actively protest this so called "movie" made by mental midgets and deranged Hollywood monsters. On the Franklin Scale of 1-10, 10 being best, Star Drek: Into Crapness gets a Negative -17.


RDJax said...

Where the heck is the "like" button. Thanks Logan for a marvelous short critique! "So say we all."

RDJax said...

Where the heck is the "like" button. Thanks Logan for a marvelous short critique! "So say we all."

AnxiousNeurosis said...

I love you! Please, please, people...If you feel the same way, post a review on Rotten Tomatoes or Metacritic or IMDB or some other similar sight. Every time I opened my mouth about the 2009 film people are like "95% on IMDB! It's obviously the best Trek ever so shut up." Please tell people not everybody likes this film or even the whole reboot series. JJ Abrams gets away with stuff that George Lucas doesn't get away with in his OWN CREATION!

Mark Sonntag said...

I prefer the original Trek but enjoy the new. Let me ask, did you like the Galactica reboot? I'm sure you did, I did too yet there are people who feel the same way about Glen A. Larson's original version. Bottom line, Trek movies by their nature and the nature of the medium need to be more action oriented. Only in TV can you really afford the Gene Roddenberry vision of Star Trek. Star Trek : The Motion Picture was the only real big screen vision of Trek, a film I actually like I must admit.

Logan Gawain said...

I don't think anyone sane ever accused Grand A. Larceny of having a "vision."

Since this site was devoted to covering the Galactica reboot, I guess we did like it.

I'm all for a Trek reboot, just an intelligent one not written for and by mental midgets. (I have collected a ton of reviews of JJ's Nu Trek disaster, that has underperformed at the box-office, but I've debated posting all those links, since it seems this Nu Trek movie is already gone and forgotten, like the empty puff of smoke it was.

You can have an action movie that is also smart and with strong characters.

It was called Serenity.

But, yes, I actually agree Star Trek The Motion Picture was my favorite one too, and the purest form of Roddenberry's ideas. Star Trek II The Wrath of Khan is a very close second in my view.